Happiness is a choice you make everyday. It does not matter if you are well or sick. When you wake up you have a choice  to live in happiness or despair. This did not resonate with me for a long time. I thought because I was in pain and sick  all the time that I needed to be unhappy. What would others think if I had a smile on my face? Would they think I was not sick? The answer to those two questions is “Who cares?”  The truth is that happiness and being ill are separate from one another. Your happiness is the one thing you can control in a out of control body. 

 How do you achieve happiness when you are chronically ill?

This is not a one size fits all question. What brings you happiness and joy is just as unique as you. Sometimes in life we focus on what makes others happy and try to mimic what they have done to try and fulfill our own happiness and this is not the way to do it. If you have a friend that has a husband, house, nice cars, and see them happy you might define that as happiness and try to do the same thing to fulfill your own happiness. True happiness does not come from things or people it comes from within. You have to know yourself,  be completely you, be honest with yourself,  and do not compromise who you are as a person when seeking happiness. Be who you are and not what others expect you to be. You are a unique gift to this Universe and  there is no one like you. So be YOU and don’t fall into the trap of others expectations of who you should be. A lot of unhappiness steams from compromising yourself  for others expectations.

 Living life to the fullest and not just existing can be your key to happiness

Living life to the fullest is different for each person as well. Sometimes we get stuck in a routine and are comfortable where we reside so we start to just exist which can cause unhappiness. Your happiness is your personal responsibility. Are you happy right now or just existing? Happiness is something that has to be worked on everyday. Lots of times people look to their spouse, kids, or friends to make them happy. They can not do this for you. They can bring you joy but your true happiness is up to you. Putting someone in the position that they have to make you happy is unfair and causes bad relationships. You are essentially giving them a job that will take a lot of energy away from their own happiness. Their happiness is their responsibility and your happiness is yours.

Finding your joy

What brings you joy? Arts and crafts? Spending time with your grandchildren? Camping? Writing? Find your passion and do not compromise doing the things that bring you joy because of being chronically ill or what others expect of you. You might have to modify how you accomplish doing what you love but giving it up is letting your illness win. The more things that you do that bring you joy and the more you become your authentic self the happier you will become. Be authentically you! If you are unhappy I have great news for you! That can all change if you want it to but the change has to come from you from with in. It is your job and no one else’s!!

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